Define You and I
by Drowning in Chaos
Summary: It's been two years since they broke up and Rose left town. Now she's back for him, but does he feel the same way?


**AN: First, some thanks to those that have made this story possible.**

**Tiffany/Vampmama for another successful round of FAGE and for never letting others ruin the fun of it. Your hard work and dedication does not go unnoticed x**

**My beta, Bower of Bliss, for being the best in the business, a busy mum, nurse and writer, yet still always making time for me. I appreciate you.**

**Artemis and Cloe, two FFA WC forum regulars who are always encouraging writers and giving great feedback. That place is magic because of you ladies! Thank you. **

**Last, but not least, Kyndall/celesticbliss for some amazing prompts. Now, I'm not a big Lady Gaga fan so I had never heard the song in one of the prompts I chose to use, but I hope I did it justice. You are an inspiration to me and when I heard a pinch writer was needed for your story I jumped in and asked if I could do it. I hope I've made it worth the wait.**

* * *

_FAGE Six Pack_

_Title: Define You and I_

_Written for: celesticbliss_

_Written By: Drowning in Chaos_

_Rating: M (to be safe) _

_Summary/Prompt used: Prompt #s 1) Lady Gaga – You and I & 3) Pink – Learn to Love Again_

_If you would like to see all the stories that are a part of this exchange, visit the facebook group: Fanficaholics Anon: Where Obsession Never Sleeps, or add the C2 to get all the stories direct to your inbox._

_ www . fanfiction community/FAGE-6-pack/93625/_

* * *

Staring at my reflection in the rear-vision mirror for the umpteenth time, I pinched my cheeks for the third time, and then picked an imaginary piece of food from between my front teeth for the eighteenth time. After cursing under my breath for the nine thousandth time, I put my sweaty hand on the door handle for the millionth time. I cursed again, looked back into the rear-vision mirror once more, and then reapplied my lipstick, for the-

"Get your shit together, Rose!" I self-admonished.

The reflected image returned a steely glare, and my red, freshly lip-stick covered lips were pursed into a determined, thin line.

This was it – time to stop being a coward. I'm a girl on a mission. Rose Hathaway does not back down from anything, even if it possibly means making a fool out of herself.

Placing my sweaty hand on the door handle for the one-millionth plus one time, I opened it.

Progress.

_That's it, Rose, keep moving forward, but lose the sweaty hands. They're super gross._

I closed the door behind me and wiped my palms on my jeans, hoping that they weren't so wet as to leave streaks on the blue denim.

Nostalgia overwhelmed my mind as I looked up at the flashing neon sign above the building before me. I was merely six feet from the front door when I thought about turning back, but it seemed I'd caught the eye of the bouncer. He smiled at me, and I smiled politely in return. If I turned around now, I'd just end up looking stupid, and God only knows how many people may have witnessed the last forty minutes of insanity that had occurred within the confines of my car.

I took the final steps towards the door when the bouncer stopped me and asked for my ID. As he looked back and forth from my face to my driver's license a few times, I studied the pink logo on his black polo shirt. 'Pink Lady' was written in an italic font, and a woman wearing nothing much but a pair of six-inch heels, sat atop the word 'lady' while leaning against the word 'pink.' I always thought the name sounded a little dirty, but my guess was the bar was built when the movie 'Grease' was a big hit. At least, that's what its décor would lead one to believe.

After what seemed like an eternity, he handed my ID back and opened the door for me. With a small nod, I thanked him. Mentally, I was walking inside, but my feet seemed to be stuck fast in a sinking pit of unease. I glanced at the bouncer and smiled sheepishly. In return, he looked at me with a raised, questioning brow. My hands started to sweat, and I thanked the bouncer once again in the hope that he thought I was just an overly-polite person and not completely bat-shit crazy.

When The Strokes 'You Only Live Once' began to play, I felt an instantaneous surge of strength and self-assurance course through me.

_Never underestimate the power of music._

I stepped through the open doorway and heard the bouncer mumble something unintelligible under his breath before closing the door behind me.

_Right, Rose - as 'The Strokes' say, 'You only live once.' Make this one count._

I noted that the place was somewhat busy. After unsuccessfully scanning the room – for the very person who always made me feel as if I was on a one-way trip to crazy town – I approached the bar. From afar, it appeared to be quite busy, but as I got closer, a gap opened up, and I stepped into it. There were two people serving, a guy and a girl, but neither of them was the person I was looking for.

As I turned and craned my neck to see if he might be serving tables in the bistro section, in my peripheral vision, someone seemed to pop up from below the bar.

"Who was ne…" a familiar voice petered off, and I spun around to face him.

My eyes met directly with his chest, and I took my time, allowing my hungry gaze to absorb the visage of his broad shoulders and sculptured arms before settling on his deep-brown eyes.

_Dimitri._

I expected a blaze of fireworks to light up the sky. Instead, there was… nothing.

_Nothing? I came all this way for nothing?_

Snapping out of my internal monologue, I searched his eyes again. Oh, there was something there alright.

_Thunder. _

"Um, surprise!" I half raised my arms and did a little jazz-hands wave before allowing my hands to fall back onto the bar. My fingers then drummed away nervously.

The look in his eyes changed from one of anger and shock to pure annoyance. His hand covered both of mine, instantly halting my tapping fingers.

"You know I hate it when you do that." His voice was much gentler than the expression in his eyes.

As hard as I tried to hold his irritated gaze, my eyes dropped to our hands. It had been two years since I had felt his touch – two very long years. The nervous twitch migrated from my fingers and headed straight for my stomach. It swirled around and around, becoming heavier and crushing my insides.

_Oh God, I'm gonna puke._

"Can I get you something?"

His voice catapulted me out of my inner turmoil. I reminded myself to breathe and looked back up at him. The thunder was gone – as was the annoyance – but if he even felt an ounce of what I was feeling, it didn't show.

"Um, a beer, thanks."

He nodded and moved to get my drink, but I grabbed a hold of his hand before it could leave mine, and our fingers became entwined in an awkward monkey-grip. With furrowed brows, he momentarily glanced at our hands before looking back at my face. I held his gaze, hoping that I appeared somewhat casual and not as desperate as I felt.

"And five minutes of your time?"

There was a moment. It wasn't quite as momentous as the choirs of heralding angels I had hoped for, but there was an undeniable glint in Dimitri's eyes as the grip on my hand tightened. My heart stopped for a beat as he nodded and leaned in towards me.

"I'll meet you on the sofa. The drink's on the house."

Before I could reply, he began to walk to the other end of the bar. I looked down in bewilderment at my empty hand. It felt as if it had been sitting in a bucket of ice for hours.

The place had a few sofa-style chairs, but I knew the one he meant. I made my way through the small crowd of milling people and the half-filled tables. Taking a seat, I sat with one leg tucked under me and waited nervously. I was studying the worn-out red leather of the seat beneath me when Dimitri sat next to me. He handed over a bottle of beer and looked at me inquisitively.

"Something interesting about the sofa?"

Looking up at him through my lashes to garner his expression, I took a swig of beer and then licked my lips.

"Only that it brings to mind some very good memories," I replied cautiously.

He smiled, and I almost cried out in excitement.

_Progress_.

He leaned back, took a swig from his own beer, and relaxed further into his seat.

"That it does," he agreed.

Our moment of banter didn't last long, and with the silence that followed, the tension grew between us again. He sat forward and placed his drink on the table in front of us.

"You wanted to talk," he pressed.

I looked around us and studied the people nearby for a while before turning back to him.

"Are you sure you want to do this here?" I asked apprehensively.

He sighed. "I have a business to run, Rose. It's not as if I can just up and leave whenever my ex decides she wants to come back and reminisce – two years after breaking my heart."

His words stung sharply like salt flung onto a gaping wound. Tears sprang to my eyes, but I blinked them away and glared at him.

"I broke your heart? 'Love fades, Rose!' Does that phrase sound familiar to you?" I seethed.

He closed his eyes for a moment and let out an exasperated sigh. "I only meant- "

"That I shouldn't love you," I finished for him.

He almost seemed relieved, but I felt nothing but rage.

"You pushed me away!" Speaking much louder than I had anticipated, I realised that the people around us were starting to stop and take notice. Breathing in deeply, I leaned towards him. I spoke quietly, but my words were pained. "_You_ pushed me away, and now _I'm_ the enemy? I moved on, just like you told me to."

"So our last night here meant nothing to you?" he asked with fire in his eyes.

"That night- that was your way of saying good-bye to me in the only way you knew how," I fumed.

His eyes widened in surprise. "Oh, Roza! Did you ever think that maybe I was begging you to stay?"

I hadn't heard him call me Roza in a long time, and I'd missed it more than I could express, but anger still boiled deep inside me.

"I'm not a mind reader," I stated.

"I thought I'd made it clear…"

I tried to replay the night in my mind. With each picture that flashed through my memory – each time his fingers had caressed my skin, each burning kiss we'd shared, each time we'd connected, every single tear I'd shed as we made love for the very last time – my heart grew heavier and angrier. There were no words between us that night – only pain and a love so complicated that I'd come to the conclusion it would be our last time.

After all the things he'd said to me the day before, I knew I shouldn't have let it happen, but my heart got in the way, and the moment he had kissed me, I knew I would take it as far as he wanted to go.

A few hours later, I'd woken up in his arms, his soft snoring assuring me that he was asleep. I knew I wouldn't be able to handle the rejection when he woke up. I just knew he would tell me it was to be the last time – we were too different from one another; I was too young and had to live my life; I had to follow my mom and move on from him – from us. Maybe he would say that our love would fade again – almost as though his love for me had already begun to die.

At least, that's what I'd thought he'd say. So I'd snuck out.

That night, my family left town, and I had followed them. I lived my life. I had moved on – or at least, I had tried to.

Snapping out of my reverie, I looked into his bewildered eyes. I knew then that nothing had changed, and everything between us was just as messy as it had always been, no matter how much I loved him. Unfailingly, there would always be something in the way of us being together.

I shook my head at him. "This was a mistake. I shouldn't have come here."

Before I could even think of what to do next, I found myself outside, running towards my car. Behind me, I faintly heard my name being called, but a loud clap of thunder drowned out the sound. As I ran, I pulled my coat around me and reached in my bag for my keys. Silently chastising myself as I stood beside my car, I continued searching for my keys, but I couldn't even remotely feel anything that resembled them.

_Ohhh, here's an idea, Rose. Why don't you get a nice, big, deep bag so you can carry everything you've ever wanted in it. Then you'll never have to switch bags around again. Yeah, you'll never find your damn keys again either._

"Roza!"

I stilled and then turned around. Dimitri now had on his old cowboy duster and stood close enough that I almost had to look straight up to see his eyes. My heart began to beat in a steady gallop. The sight of him in his duster brought back another flood of memories – this time of our first date.

Dimitri took me on a picnic at the local lookout, and he'd placed the duster around my shoulders to keep me warm once the sun had gone down. We'd shared stories of our past and laughed. He had been so sweet – so gentle.

_God knows I love this man. _

Vehemently, I turned away from him and allowed all the pent-up anger and hurt to rise within me. And rise it did. I was a volcano ready to erupt.

"You can't just say one thing and mean another! You can't tell someone not to love you – to move on and be someone else, somewhere else – and then screw them and expect it to be seen as some kind of gesture of love! You don't get to tell me what to do and hate me for doing it."

"You were a teenager, Rose. I was… older. I was confused."

I scoffed. "Good to see the same lame excuses are working for you – 'cause they're sure as Hell starting to get old for me."

Rifling through my bag, I hunted for my keys again. The sky was dark now, and the limited light of the parking lot made it impossible for me to find what I was searching for.

"Why did you come back?"

His question made me stall, and I threw my hands up in frustration.

Turning around to face him, I replied, "You wanna know the truth? I don't even know anymore!"

_Liar, liar pants on fire. _

Another loud roll of thunder clapped above, and it made us flinch. When the heavens opened up, and it began to pour, I looked towards the leadened sky.

"Couldn't you have chosen a different, maybe drier, cliché?" I called out to no one in particular.

I heard Dimitri's chuckle, and I looked at him angrily.

"I suppose you're after these?" Pulling my keys from his pocket, he dangled them in front of my face. I tried to snatch them from him, but he moved his hand away just in time. "They dropped out of your pocket when you ran," he explained. I moved to snatch them again, and once again, he moved them, high and out of my reach. "You can have them on one condition." I raised my brows at him as I was in no mood for games. Already, the rain thoroughly soaked me to the bone. "Five minutes." With a growl of defiance, I jumped in an attempt to grab my keys, only to fail again. "Just say yes, Rose."

"Fine! Yes!" I yelled in exasperation.

He unlocked the car, and I made a move to open the driver's door, but instead he opened the rear passenger door and dragged me inside with him. After closing the door behind us, I leaned back and shut my eyes. Except for the sound of the rain steadily beating against the car, silence enveloped the two of us.

I could feel him watching me, but didn't dare to open my eyes. I didn't want the sight of him distracting me from my thoughts. After inhaling a shuddering breath, I said everything I was too afraid to say with my eyes open.

"I tried. I truly did. I came back to prove to you that what I felt – what I still _feel_ – it's real. It was never just some stupid teenage crush."

Silence.

"I thought maybe we could- God; I don't know… start over, or take it from where we left off. I guess I just needed to see you. I needed to know if you felt the same as me. I needed to see if your love had actually faded – just as you'd predicted."

"Never." His voice was soft, but I could feel that he was close.

I opened my eyes and looked to my left. He was in the middle seat, facing me, with his elbow resting on the back of the seat and his head leaning on his hand. His eyelashes were wet and glistening from the rain.

"You lied to me," I whispered. "I wasted two whole years pining for you."

"And I for you." He moved closer and gently reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear. I closed my eyes for a moment as his touch warmed my skin. "It's my fault, but please know this, Roza, I too have suffered. I should have told you how I felt – I should never have let you go. That morning, I had planned to do both of those things, but I woke up, and you were gone. It was already too late."

"You could have called," I stated.

"I wanted to, but every time I tried, something always held me back. What can I say? I was confused."

I had so much more to say, but I was tired of talking. I allowed the silence between us to linger, and this time it wasn't hostile or awkward, it was merely peaceful. I studied him curiously as he stared back at me, seemingly in awe.

"What?" I asked.

He placed his hand on my cheek and looked into the depths of my soul. A genuine smile appeared on his face.

"I never thought I'd actually see you again," he murmured as he brushed his thumb over my skin. With his other hand, he reached out to grab my own, and our fingers entwined. "I never thought that I'd get to touch you again." He leaned in closer still, but stalled as if waiting for me to protest, and then he kissed me gently. "I never thought that I'd ever get the chance to kiss you again," he whispered against my lips.

An involuntary moan escaped from me, and it was all the encouragement he needed. The kiss deepened, and I returned it with vigor. He pulled me on top of him, and instantly, his hands were everywhere. My own hands found themselves at home by combing into his hair. My jacket came off, but the cold air on my skin was like a slap to the face, and I quickly pulled back.

"Wait. Stop. Stop."

Placing my hands on his chest, I desperately tried to get my breath back. I half expected him to protest, but he simply sat there gasping for air. He grabbed onto my hands and rubbed them as if to warm them up, and I realized then that I was actually shivering. Pulling me to him, he wrapped my jacket around my shoulders, his arms keeping it in place. As warm as his embrace was, I couldn't stop shaking, however, I knew it wasn't the cold that was making me shake. I was a sobbing emotional wreck.

He whispered words of comfort against my hair and held me tighter. He placed kisses on my shoulder, my head, and just below my ear before pushing me up gently. While cupping my face, he wiped my tears away with the pads of his thumbs, before gingerly kissing me on the lips.

"I love you, Roza. I never stopped loving you, and I'll never stop loving you."

A fresh wave of tears flowed, and I was shocked to see tears were also in his eyes.

"I love you, too, it's just-"

"We have a lot to talk about?"

I nodded.

"Come on then."

He helped me to slide off his lap, grabbed my keys from where they had fallen on the seat, and opened the door.

"I'm driving."

Before I could ask what he was on about, he was out the door. He climbed into the driver's seat, and because I didn't want to face the rain again, I awkwardly climbed my way towards the front passenger seat, just as he started the engine.

"Where are we going?" I asked while putting my seatbelt on.

"Somewhere that you can get dry and warm and we can talk." He grabbed my hand and kissed the knuckles before placing it in his lap.

As he reversed out of the parking space, I asked, "And where would that be?"

Putting the car in drive, he laced his fingers in mine and smiled at me. "My place."

"And here I thought you had a business to run, and you couldn't just up and leave whenever your ex wanted to reminisce, or you know – whatever," I teased, half-jokingly.

He glanced at me, his expression not quite as amused.

"And I promise you that that's the last lie I will ever tell you. I'm the boss, and I can do whatever I want. Tonight, I want to be with my Roza."

I leaned back against my seat, closed my eyes, and smiled at his words. Not only did I like the idea of no more lies, but I loved the idea of being his Roza.


End file.
